Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
