Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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