am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
