"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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