she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize