apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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