I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
