dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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