currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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