Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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