Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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