Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
You're breaking my sexual little heart
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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