Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
