Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
how does that bad decision feel?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
