The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Couch. On fire.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
