im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
