Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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