i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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