there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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