there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
