She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
