Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
