is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
