Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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