Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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