Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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