everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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