Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize
