Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
