i permit you to call me
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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