People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I think your dad took our porno
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
