He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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