then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize