you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize