Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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