okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
