Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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