Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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