dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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