yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize