Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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