Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize