I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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