check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Operation Purity has been aborted
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
