So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
