Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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