okay pat passed out under dana's car
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
