hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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