Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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