I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
