12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
