sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
