a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
